I’ve got seven or eight blogs drafted up that will likely never see the light of day. They are all just random opinion pieces I wrote on a whim over the past couple of months. I usually write a blog, then leave it sit for a day or two before doing a final edit and then post it. Whenever I went to do the final edit on most of those blogs, I just didn’t feel like they were that positive or contained anything of substance.
Now, I have always thought of myself as an innately optimistic person. I do semi-frequently get told I’m too critical of myself though, something I used to find strange. As I began to meditate and write more through lockdown, this veil of optimism gradually fizzled away on me. I started to notice what I perceived as optimism was more comparable to confidence. I have a lot of faith in my own abilities, (and I think this is a good skill to cultivate). However, being positive, and being confident are two substantially different things.
I have my own hints of anxiety and worry no doubt, but when I visualize a race, I am always optimistic of the outcome. And when I talk to people I always try to be honest and optimistic. The blogs that I drafted up never seemed to capture this optimism I felt internally. I guess it’s an old force of habit of mine to get a bit bogged down in the negatives and follow those thoughts/ideas more than I should.
My shoulder is still giving me some grief, so I did get stuck in my head again for the past few weeks. Thankfully my friend Roisin brought me on holidays recently and helped me get back to the land of the living! I just thought it might be a good little writing exercise to list off five of the more positive things I have going for me at the minute, in no particular order.
1: My Coach
I’ve been working with James for about a year now I think. Without a doubt its the best sporting decision I’ve made in recent years. I’ve spoken about how highly I rate James as a coach, but I’d like to show how genuine a guy he actually is. Back around March when Grandad was sick and I was simply all over the place, James would ring every few days to have a catch up about training. There was a couple of weeks, maybe a month where I honestly couldn’t even manage more than one word answers to his questions, and he just sat on the phone chatting away for twenty or thirty minutes, just to simply keep chatting.
It’s a bit cliché but if you read many sports autobiographies, you will probably be familiar with the whole “trust the process” concept. I had gotten skeptical of whether or not I would ever fully trust a coach, let alone have a nice Bromance going with one. Definitely something I am very grateful for. (This much ass kissing is likely to get me a couple of extra Vo2 max sessions put into my Training Peaks, but its worth it 😉 ).
2: My sponsors
I could write a kind story for every one of my sponsors, not just James! Whether its Aidan in VeloRevolution calling me out on my bulls**t and keeping my grounded, Evan making fun of my erratic eating tendencies, or Emily and the Kinetica crew making me laugh at whatever random thing they are up to, I’d be lost without it all. I never thought I would be so well backed by Irish companies and its another thing I can’t be anything but grateful for 🙂
3: My current health
Having spent the latter part of the summer stuck on the couch, the fact that I’m back doing reasonably structured training and progressing again is a big win! I hit a 50m kick PB in the pool last week which is my first PB in the water in years. Can’t complain with that!
4: My Blog
I had a big love/hate relationship with this blog when I first started it. Since I’ve kickstarted it again though its actually been pretty good for me. I’ve found that writing out my thoughts slowly, and in a well articulated way helps me organize things in my own head. It helps break that cycle of talking fast, thinking slow. When I write these I think slow, type slower haha.
Something I hadn’t expected is the responses I’ve been getting to my posts. Whether its just a thumbs up on Instagram or a full chat, I’ve engaged with a lot of people I wouldn’t have otherwise chatted to had I not been blogging. I’ve always found it strange that people follow my sports career, and I probably always will! But interacting with so many new people has been a really positive thing that’s come into my life in 2021 🙂
5: Chasing opportunities
Myself and Aichlinn O’Reilly are heading to Spain for a five week camp in January! It’ll be my first camp in two or three years and I am absolutely buzzing to head off. I’ve missed training with Aichlinn since our college days, and training in the sun is always better 😉 Hopefully it’ll be the start of a good lead into the 2022 season for us both. 🙂
I’m sat here smiling in the coffee shop having written these out. It’s been a fun little exercise to do. So, if you’re having a rough day, or you just want to add a smile to your day, try and write down five random things you’re grateful for in your day today 🙂
Darren Does Tri 